Bible Study Series; A Good Woman Proverbs 31

 A GOOD WOMAN

Proverbs 31

Who wrote Proverbs 31?

Proverbs 31:1-3

The sayings of King Lemuel — an oracle his mother taught him:

2 "O my son, O son of my womb,

O son of my vows,

3 do not spend your strength on women,

your vigor on those who ruin kings.

According to the text, it was written by King Lemuel, but inspired by his mother.

She valued the reputation of her son, his position as king, and his relationship with

the nation God placed him to serve.

Who was King Lemuel?

 There is speculation that Hezekiah, who became the 13th king of Judah after the kingdom of Israel split in two, added these last two chapters to the book of Proverbs

  Regarding the writers themselves, Agur and Lemuel, the Jewish Talmud states that "Solomon was called by six names:  Solomon, Jedidiah, Koheleth, Son of Jakeh, Agur, and Lemuel." (forchristian women.org)

The Name Lemuel is a Hebrew name, according to the Eastern Bible Commentary means

dedicated to God, a king whom his mother instructed. The rabbinical commentary identifies as

King Solomon.

Knowing that King Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines, why would you want to listen

to him? The evidence is King Solomon was a womanizer, an abuser of women's feelings.

What could he know about a good wife? Surly, the King did not have much time to spend

with any woman.

Assuming Proverbs 31 was written by King Solomon, at what age did he write it?

No one knows, God does not tell us. We know that earlier part of his kingship, Solomon

was concentrated on building the Temple in Jerusalem. He established himself as a man of

wisdom throughout Israel and in foreign countries. He was devoted to God in the earlier part

of His kingship.

Perhaps after the Temple was built, he spent his time on his fleshly desires for women.

Let me suggest, that in the latter years of his reign, he settled down and reflected on

what he had learned in life, writing Ecclesiastes and Proverbs.

In my older age, I have had a chance to reflect on my life’s journey. In this time

I often reflect on the teachings of my mother, father, and grandparents. According to

the text, the king was reflecting on the teaching of his mother.

If you couple your relationship with God, with the teaching of your parents and your

life's experiences, you can conclude with good advice. Perhaps that is what Solomon

did for us in the Book of Proverbs.

The first advice the King’s mother gave him is to settle on one woman. If the King was

Solomon, his mother was Bathsheba who was taken from her first husband by his

Father, King David. David had several wives and many conflicts among his children.

Marriage is a sacred institution created by God. He meant for man to be the head of

the household and to treat His wife with respect. Bathsheba knew what it meant to be

disrespected and devalued.

IDENTIFYING THE WORTH OF A WOMAN

Proverbs 31:10-12

10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her so that he shall not need spoil.

12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

The word virtuous means strength, power, resourceful

You have to know your worth. God designed you to be powerful and resourceful.

It is part of your DNA. Don’t let no man or woman devalue you.

Why should a strong woman get attached to a weak man? Somebody weak will try to

bring you down to their level. I grew up around some strong women. They didn’t

have a lot of education, but they were strong in the Lord and strong in the community.

It takes a strong woman to raise children; Feed them, dress them, bathe them, educate

them, and discipline them. You need to know you got value. The Lord says you are

more valuable than rubies. A ruby is a precious stone, beautiful to look at. A ruby has

hardness, it has durability, and luster, and is a rare stone. It is bright red, the color of the precious

blood of Jesus.

A man must learn to see his spouse not just as a wife, but as a valuable partner.

A strong woman can be trusted. A strong woman is not wasteful. A strong woman follows

the Lord.

Parents and Grandparents, teach your children what to look for in a mate.

Bathsheba had experience. She was taken from her husband. Forced into adultery.

King David got her pregnant and didn't want the baby. David tried to fool

her husband that the baby was his. When that didn’t work, he had Bathsheba’s

husband put on the front line of the battle so he would be killed. King David did this

to save his reputation. He disrespected and disregarded the worth of a beautiful lady.

The life Bathsheba knew as a young bride was destroyed by

the selfish lust of a king. Yet this mother gave her son valuable advice on how to

value a woman.

A GOOD WOMAN PUTS HER SKILLS TO WORK

Proverbs 31:13-16

She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

14 She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar.

15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

A Good wife is a working woman. She works inside the house and outside the house.

She does whatever it takes to provide for her family.

Watch this fellows, a good husband provides the wife with help when she needs it.

It is a working partnership. A good husband is aware of the wife's workload.

If both are working, you may not be able to do everything without some outside help.

A GOOD WOMAN KNOWS HOW TO HANDLE

 BUSINESS

Proverbs 31:16-20

16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands, she planteth a vineyard.

17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.

18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.

19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

A good wife has good business sense. She knows a good deal when she sees it.

If need be, she makes independent decisions for the family.

In verse 17, a good wife takes responsibility for the decision she makes.

A good wife works long days and into the night.

A good wife is not idle, but busy.

A GOOD WIFE IS GENEROUS

Proverbs 31:20-23

She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household is clothed with scarlet.

22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

A good wife knows it is not all about her and her family.

She is generous to the poor.

She realizes she has been blessed and shares her blessing with others.

A good wife is thrifty, resourceful, and creative. She makes the best clothes

for her family.

A GOOD WIFE DRESSES TO LOOK GOOD FOR HER

 HUSBAND

A good wife cares for herself and dresses well for her husband.

Ladies you looked good when you got him. Keep looking good to

keep him. Other women will be glad to take your man.

A GOOD WOMAN IS NOT PASSIVE

Proverbs 31:23-26

23 Her husband is known in the gates when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

25 Strength and honor are her clothing; she shall rejoice in time to come.

26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

A good woman makes her husband look good around other men.

A good woman has stuff to say and goods to sell.

She is a strong woman with good character. She does not have time for gossip or foolishness

If you need good advice, she is the woman to seek.

THE REPUTATION OF A GOOD WOMAN SPEAKS FOR HER

Proverbs 31:27-31

27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.

31 Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.

A good woman works for the family. She does not try to please the neighbors.

She sets the standards for other women to strive for.

She is smart and kindhearted and her family appreciates her.

The key to her successful life is her love for the Lord.

Her reputation speaks to her goodness

LADIES VALUE YOURSELF AS GOD VALUES YOU

DON’T BE A VICTIM, BE VICTORIOUS

CLASS QUESTIONS

WHAT LESSONS DO YOU SEE IN PROVERBS 31?

WHAT SHOULD MEN LEARN FROM PROVERBS 31?

WHAT ENCOURAGEMENT DO YOU GET FROM

PROVERBS 31?

Rev. M. Mitchell

This Week's Sunday School Lesson, "Pray For Me So I May Believe", John 17:6-21

 PRAY FOR ME THAT I MAY BELIEVE

John 17:1-21

In this text, Jesus prepared His disciples for His return to heaven. He first prayed to the

Father for Himself, then for his disciples.

His prayer for Himself was that He be glorified so the Father would be glorified. Jesus did

not mention His crucifixion, but that was in view because it was the way to His glorification

to return to heaven.

After Jesus said this, he looked toward heaven and prayed:

"Father, the time has come. Glorify your Son, that your Son may glorify you. 2 For you granted him authority over all people that he might give eternal life to all those you have given him. 3 Now this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. 4 I have brought you glory on earth by completing the work you gave me to do. 5 And now, Father, glorify me in your presence with the glory I had with you before the world began.

There ought to be prayer before action. You and I cannot tell what tomorrow will bring. Jesus

knowing all things, prayed to the Father for what He knew would take place. If we want to

imitate Jesus we should be constantly in prayer.

From time to time we need to review with the Father our purpose for being on earth.

Jesus's purpose for descending from heaven and becoming man was to grant salvation to all of

God’s chosen. He was given all power over the human race. He only exercised the power

according to the will of the Father. Jesus defines for us the essence of eternal life. Eternal

life is to know the Father and the Son.

There are lots of man-made gods. But there is only one theos, supreme divinity. No man-made

god can have any power or can create anything. The work Jesus came to do was to make known

the Father and Himself to His chosen. To know the Father is to acknowledge, worship and, obey

his commands and accept the Son as savior.

Jesus honored the Father with His death on the cross which provided atonement for the sins of the world.

Jesus requested the Father to glory Him with His resurrection and return to the heavenly

throne seated at His right hand. Jesus spoke in the presence as if the crucifixion and resurrection

had already taken place. The work of Jesus exists in all time. Time is relevant to God's creation.

THE REVELATION FROM JESUS

John 17:6-8

6 "I have revealed you to those whom you gave me out of the world. They were yours; you gave them to me and they have obeyed your word. 7 Now they know that everything you have given me comes from you. 8 For I gave them the words you gave me and they accepted them. They knew with certainty that I came from you, and they believed that you sent me.

The work of Jesus was for His chosen, not the entire humanity. It is the Father who chose all

who He will draw to believe in Him. No one can come to Jesus unless he is drawn by the Father.

To be chosen is by God's divine election and not by ourselves. Jesus gave credit to the Father

for all the work He did on earth. To imitate Jesus is to give credit to the Father for all we have and all our

Accomplishments.

The Word of God convicts us and draws us into obedience. Jesus came as a teacher and preacher.

He spent three and a half years revealing the Word to His disciples and those who followed Him.

He taught His disciples everything the Father gave Him.

All believers are ambassadors of Christ. It is our job to teach and proclaim the Word of God

to our families and everyone we come in contact with. It is not our job to convince anyone

of the truth of God's Word. That is the job of the Holy Spirit. It is our job to be a testimony of

the truth.

Jesus is the Word and it was His job to bring His disciple into a belief in Him. The 11 disciples

were the apostles who started the church of Jesus Christ. Our confidence in Jesus is enhanced

by their testimony and sacrifices.

PRAY FOR ME, LORD

V:9 I pray for them. I am not praying for the world, but for those you have given me, for they are yours. 10 All I have is yours, and all you have is mine. And glory has come to me through them. 11 I will remain in the world no longer, but they are still in the world, and I am coming to you. Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name — the name you gave me — so that they may be one as we are one.

Prayer is our first line of communication with the Father. It is our job to pray for those around us.

Prayer is so important that Jesus gave us a promise; If you ask the Father in His name we will be

given what we ask.

Notice Jesus' prayer was for believers and not the world. Jesus claims us as His. He paid the

ransom for all believers with His shed blood on the cross. The Father gave all believers to

Jesus to pay the ransom. Jesus has a vested interest in us. It is because of our faith that

Jesus is glorified. Every believer ought to honor Jesus in praise and worship. It is Jesus'

prayer to the Father that we receive our protection.

The ultimate goal for believers is to become one with Jesus. One in His love. One in His

forgiveness. One in His tolerance. One in His obedience to the Father. One in His power

and authority. One in His joy and peace.

THANK JESUS FOR SAVING ME

V: 12 While I was with them, I protected them and kept them safe by that name you gave me. None has been lost except the one doomed to destruction so that Scripture would be fulfilled.

13 "I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them. 14 I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world.

Our temporary position is here on Earth. Our permanent residence is heaven with the Father.

It is Jesus who keeps His arm of protection around us 24/ 7. He not only protects us from

the evil of the world but also from the adversary of the world, Satan, and his demons. We are locked

in the salvation of Jesus and we cannot get out. We may stray from time to time, but Jesus

got a hold of us.

Jesus' death on the cross was no surprise, but His joy. It was the finishing touch of His ministry.

We have joy because we are confident that we have a place He has prepared for us in Heaven.

The hatred of this world is expected, but victory is ours because Jesus has overcome the world.

We have the Word of God to remind us of His abundant grace and mercy.

JUST VISITING, HEAVEN IS MY HOME

V15 My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. 16 They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. 17 Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth. 18 As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world. 19 For them I sanctify myself, that they too may be truly sanctified.

20 "My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, 21 that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me.

We have mountains to climb and valleys to travel that God will not remove. As long as we are

here on earth our protection is guaranteed. Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow

of death I have no evil to fear because God is with me.

We are not of this world. We are set apart from the world with the truth that is Jesus Christ.

Being ambassadors for Christ our mission is to proclaim the gospel to the ends of the earth.

By teaching the Word of God, others that have been chosen will be drawn to Christ by

the Holy Spirit.

Our purpose is to bear much fruit by abiding in Christ so others will be encouraged in the Word.

John 15:7-8

If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. 8 This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.

THANK YOU JESUS FOR YOUR PRAYER

This Week's Sunday School Lesson, "Jesus The True Vine" John 15:1-17, 5//21/23

 JESUS, THE TRUE VINE

John 15:1-17

PRUNING WITH LOVE

There is a reason for pruning the branches of the vine according to the

Samaria and Lessons from the Vineyard by Doug Hershey

“Vineyard and Vines in the Bible

In biblical times, vineyards were very common. It was a great source of income, food, and drink as well as a place to enjoy and celebrate. Yeshua (Jesus) often referred to vineyards or vines in His teachings.

The Pruning at the Vineyard

Many branches are found growing on the main vine. Yet the further away from the vine these branches grow, the harder it is for them to receive nutrients and produce.

Branches that are growing far to the side or underneath the vine are trimmed since they will have a harder time getting sunlight. It is also simply easier to harvest a branch that is growing straight up.

So, after pruning the underside and sides of the vine, a few branches may grow close together. The vinedresser will keep the most upright and again, prune the others. The closer the branch is to the vine, the healthier and more fruitful it will be.

Likewise, if we are to bear fruit that the Father desires, the closer we are to Yeshua, the better.

The Life-giving Wind in Samaria

Once the gardener removes the dead branches, along with the underside and wayward ones, he considers the spacing of the remaining branches. The upright and fruitful ones need at least 4-5 inches from each other to allow the wind to pass through."

Vineyards have been planted and cultivated since the time of Noah's Ark landed on Mount Ararat. Noah planted a vineyard and drank wine (Genesis 9:20) God brought Israel into the promised land which was productive and complete with vineyards:

Deuteronomy 8:8-9

8 a land with wheat and barley, vines and fig trees, pomegranates, olive oil, and honey; 9 a land where bread will not be scarce and you will lack nothing; a land where the rocks are iron and you can dig copper out of the hills.

The first miracle Jesus performed was at a wedding feast where He turned water into wine. The vineyards were plentiful and the production and the sale of wine was a thriving industry.

Jesus used the vineyard to describe His relationship with the Father and the believers' relationship to Him.

THE TRUE VINE

V:1 "I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2 He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.

There are many types of vines. Some produce fruit to eat, some produce flowers,

and some are just thrones. There are blackberry vines, tomato vines, watermelon

vines, and grape vines, just to name a few of them.

Jesus used the grapevine to symbolize Himself. Every Jew could identify with

His analogy. Just as there are different kinds of vines, there are different religions

that claim the Father, but not the Son. Without the Son, there is no spiritual

fruit for the branches.

The Jewish nation was a vine, that rejected the Father as their gardener (Isaiah 5:1).

They chose their traditions over the Word of God.

The true vine chooses the Father as the Gardner and follows His commands.

Believers are branches of Jesus. Verse 15:1 describes the relationship between

the Father, the Son, and the believers. Believers are placed in the Son and

cared for by the Father.

Some believers produce no fruit. They have a relationship but are not

active in the ministry. What does it mean in verse 2 when He said the Fathers

take him away? The Greek word for taketh away is airo which means lift up

or raise up. This does not appear to be a loss of salvation verse. Jesus said

what the Father has given me, I lose none. The branch may be lifted up to

the light to be enlightened. We were chosen to be in Christ before the foundation

of the world (Ephesians 4:1). We were drawn to Christ from a dark place. The

process of being enlightened takes time and is different for every believer.

None of us came to Christ-producing fruit.

Every believer has a direct connection to the Son who has a direct connection to

the Father. Jesus describes Himself as the vine planted by the Father. It is the

Father's job is to maximize the production of the vineyard.

There are four classes of fruit in this text. No fruit, fruit, more fruit, and much

fruit. I believe the no fruit represents the newcomers to Christ and the complacent

church members who enjoy the relationship with Christ but are not committed

to service.

The fruit-bearing branches are those believers who are working in Christ

using their gifts and talents but have areas that hinder spiritual growth.

They may still hold on to an unforgiving spirit. They may harbor some

envy and jealousy. They have some areas of lust they are struggling with.

God knows us intimately and knows what it takes to curve our appetites

to total commitment to Him.

The Greek word for purge or prune is kathairo which means to cleanse.

All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. We must look at ourselves,

recognize our sins, and repent. God’s mercy extends to us with forgiveness.

CLEANED BY THE WORD

V:3 You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. 4 Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.

None of us are good in ourselves. It is our faith in the atoning blood that Jesus

shed on the cross that cleanses us from all unrighteousness. The word remain or

abide in Greek is the word meno which means to stay in a given place. We have

a choice each day to be obedient to God’s commands and remain in fellowship

with Jesus.

As a branch cannot produce grapes without being connected to the vine, we cannot

do the work of Christ without fellowship with Him. We have been given the job

of imitating Christ in our daily activities. We cannot do the work of Christ without

submitting to the guidance and direction of the Holy Spirit that resides within

us. Producing fruit is our job. What is the fruit Jesus referred to?

Galatians 5:22-24

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentlenesses, and self-control. Against such things, there is no law.

There are nine elements of the fruit listed here. By ourselves, we are not capable of

producing this kind of fruit. Our character has been shaped by the world which

does not include this. It is only through the new creation in Christ that we are enabled

to produce fruit.

We have been placed in Christ according to His divine favor. It is through God's

favor that we were elected to produce fruit.

REMAIN IN JESUS

V:5 "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me, you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire, and burned. 7 If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given to you. 8 This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.

The relationship with Jesus does not exist without Him being in our hearts. Our

relationship with Jesus is demonstrated through our obedience to His commands.

Acts 17:28

'For in him we live and move and have our being.' As some of your own poets have said, 'We are his offspring.'

Notice verses 5 -7 begin with "if". The if represents our personal, daily choice

to follow Jesus. Verse 5 is a blessing and a curse. Remain Jesus; produce

much fruit. Break fellowship with Jesus, produce nothing.

Verse 6 is the result of doing nothing. By doing nothing you wither into a state

of worthlessness useful only for firewood which warms for a short time. God's

mercy is shown here because Jesus said you are like firewood. The word

like is the Greek word hos a comparative adverb. Hos is part of the word

hosanna which means oh save. We are saved by Grace not by works.

He If in verse 7 is the blessing of remaining in fellowship with Jesus;

Ask and it will be given to you; your wants, your needs, and your desires.

If we remain in Jesus we will only ask what is pleasing to Him.

Verse 8 is God’s will for our lives. To give Him glory by producing much

fruit. Why? So the world can see what a disciple of Jesus looks like. We are

the first beneficiaries of abiding in Jesus.

LOVE LIKE THE FATHER

V:9 "As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. 10 If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. 11 I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.

It is our duty to give a testimony of the Father's love for us. Jesus constantly talked

about the Father to his disciples and followers. He left no doubt that He was under

the Father’s commands.

We must first know the Father’s love for us. We must consider that whatever we

have, whatever we have accomplished is because of the Father’s Love. From

time to time we must reflect on what God has done in our lives. It is only

when we have confidence in the Father that we will express our confidence

to others.

The evidence of our love for God is our obedience to His commands. Notice

the result of our obedience is Jesus’s joy. Not partial joy, but complete joy.

Not joy that fades when trouble arises, but joy during trouble.

A FRIEND’S LOVE

V:12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command. 15 I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.

Love requires sacrifice. If you are not willing to sacrifice yourself for someone,

love doesn’t exist. I am not talking about killing yourself. I am talking about doing

all that you know that will be helpful to them.

You can like a person without loving them. You can’t love a person

without liking them.

Those you love become your friends. Those you like become people you use. You

tell a true friend everything that will be helpful to them. You don’t worry about

hurting a true friend's feelings if what you know will help them.

Jesus made known to us everything He knew about the Father. We can only have

full knowledge of the Father through faith in Jesus.

CHOSEN BY LOVE

V:16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit — fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. 17 This is my command: Love each other.

We must keep in mind that we did not come to Christ on our own initiative. It

was the Lord who chose us and gifted us with the spiritual gifts and talents to

bear fruit.

The benefit of being a branch in the vine of Jesus is the constant flow of spiritual

blessing. The blessing that we pass on to others is in abundance. We are assured that

all we need and want comes from the Father when our prayers are in Jesus' name.

We learn to love others through the love Jesus has shown us.

Rev. M. Mitchell

This Week's Sunday School Lesson, "Jesus, The Resurrection And The Life", John 11:17-27, 5/14/2023

 JESUS, THE RESURRECTION, AND THE LIFE

John 11:17-27

A SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP

There was a strong intimate relationship between Lazarus, Mary, and Martha. We

are not told how the relationship developed. What we know is Jesus ate with them

and visited their home. We don’t find many occasions where Jesus was entertained

in the home of His followers. We don’t find many occasions where the family

claimed Jesus loved them. Jesus had a special relationship with this family.

A messenger from Mary and Martha had come to Jesus with the news that Lazarus was sick. Jesus delayed coming until the fourth day. He informed His disciple that He was

going to see Lazarus who He knew was dead. It was Thomas who took the lead

and said I will go and die with you knowing that Jews wanted to kill Jesus.

The name Thomas means twin in Aramaic. The Greek translation is Didymus.

We all at times have twin thoughts.

Unbelief and depression

doubt and hopelessness

doubt and devotion

What keeps us stable is knowledge of Jesus and His promises.

GOT TROUBLE, CALL JESUS

V:17 On his arrival, Jesus found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb for four days. 18 Bethany was less than two miles from Jerusalem, 19 and many Jews had come to Martha and Mary to comfort them in the loss of their brother.

The question is why did Jesus allow Lazarus to die? He could have immediately

showed up and healed Lazarus. He could have healed Lazarus from a distance

(John 4:43-34).

None of these solutions would have given the intended glory to the Father.

None of these solutions would have strengthened the faith of Mary and Martha.

None of these solutions would have removed the doubt of the power of Jesus

from the disciples.

None of theses solutions would have glorified the Father before the crowd of

witnesses

Jesus showed His love for the family by coming when He Did. His love for us

is a perfecting love, not a pampering love. The Love of Jesus allows suffering.

Love and suffering are compatible and are strengthening partners.

The question is why the four-day delay?

The delay teaches us to wait on the Lord

The delay teaches us to trust the way Jesus responds.

The delay teaches us that our disappointments are a lack of faith. (Psalms 50:15).

The delay teaches us to accept the good with the bad.

The delay teaches us that what we want for our loved ones may not be the best

for them.

The delay teaches us that suffering is for a time, but joy is forever.

The delay allows others to observe our faith in Jesus,

The delay teaches us that there is a greater opportunity to believe.

The delay teaches us that death is not the end but a new beginning.

The delay is a test of our faith.

MEET JESUS IN CONSTANT PRAYER

V:20 When Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went out to meet him, but Mary stayed at home.

21 "Lord," Martha said to Jesus, "if you had been here, my brother would not have died. 22 But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask."

Martha’s conversation with Jesus shows she believed in the power of Jesus to heal

the sick. She expected Jesus to come to her rescue. She was disappointed that Jesus

did not come in time to save Lazarus. Even in her disappointment, she believed

the Father would give Jesus what He asked for. Like us, Martha’s faith did not

extend beyond what she knew. She probably had witnessed many healing of Jesus,

but may not have seen Him restore life to a dead person. The Lord can do

exceedingly abundantly more than we can ask or conceive.

Notice what we learn from Martha

She did not hesitate to call on Jesus first.

She reminded Jesus of His love for her family.

She call on Jesus to do what she was confident HE could do.

She did not let her disappointment change her faith.

She expressed her confidence in the power of Jesus.

Her trouble was a learning experience with Jesus.

TAKE TIME TO LISTEN TO JESUS THROUGH MEDITATION

V:23 Jesus said to her, "Your brother will rise again."

24 Martha answered, "I know he will rise again in the resurrection on the last day."

Jesus uses our disappointments to drive us into a deeper study of the Word.

Martha set aside her disappointment to learn more of the Word.

When we study God's Word we ought to ask questions to get a deeper understanding.

Martha believed in the resurrection of the last day. Jesus spoke of the

present day and the last day.

Martha called on Jesus as her savior. We must do the same.

By excepting Jesus as our personal Savior, all believers have been resurrected

from death into the newness of life.

Sometimes it takes a tragedy in our lives for us to see Jesus as He is,

The God of all our circumstances.

DEATH BEFORE LIFE IN JESUS

V:25 Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; 26 and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?"

27 "Yes, Lord," she told him, "I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, who was to come into the world."

Jesus does not rule out death as part of our life’s experience. He includes physical death

to make us understand that this life is temporary. Our resurrected life is eternal.

Martha's final and most important inspiration was Jesus as the Son of God.

In front of Martha was the divine Word which she readily accepted.

The true resurrection for believers has already taken place. We are just waiting

until our time on earth is complete. Like Martha, we have more learning about

Jesus to complete for the work of the Lord.

Lazarus died, but His love for Jesus assured him a place in heaven. His physical

death was an exercise for the world to see the true mission of Jesus. The resurrection

of Lazarus was an exhibition of the power of Jesus for all to see.

In front of all believers and in all believers is the divine Word. Accept Him and

live joyfully. Trust Jesus and live in confidence. Live in His spirit and live without

fear. Walk with Jesus and live in His righteousness.

Rev. M. Mitchell

Bible Study Series: Dating, Love And Sex, Song Of Solomon

 DATING, LOVE, AND SEX

SONG OF SOLOMON

God created the world out of His love for mankind. God so loved the world that

He gave His only Son and whoever believes in Him shall not perish.

Much of today's violence is due to a loss of family values. We have lost the desire

to love our neighbors. Many fear their neighbors and others see them as an opportunity

for abuse and theft. I would love to see the world in a loving family mode.

The Song of Solomon takes me back to my teenage years when my hormones were

raging and love was in the air. I spent my college years pursuing my first wife

which resulted in a marriage that lasted 42 years until her death. Life happen and

somewhere along the line, the thrill of dating was lost. God gave me a second wife

with the experience to love.

Song of Solomon is good reading for young couples and a great review and reminder

for older couples. Some commentaries spiritualize the entire text, which it is. But it

is written in the language of love. God gives those who are considering marriage

the principles of choosing a mate and pursuing a mate with love and respect.

To young couples, it is recommended reading and to older couples it recommended

review.

The word Song of Solomon in Hebrew means the most beautiful song.

Solomon wrote 1000 songs, but this one is called the most beautiful.

I do not believe in love at first sight. I believe there is lust at first sight. To love

a person you have to know the person. Love requires commitment and sacrifice.

I don’t believe at first sight one is ready to commit or sacrifice.

You may see someone you like at first sight, but you have no idea what you are

getting into. You don’t know what their background is at first sight. Underneath a

smiling face may be pain and turmoil.

At the time that Solomon, the third King of Israel wrote this Song, the Jewish custom

was that the Father of the groom and the father of the bride got together and agreed

upon a dowry, the groom or groom's father was to pay for the bride.

A legally binding contract was made and the bride was betrothed to the groom.

No love was involved just a financial commitment. A good example of this is Jacob’s

marriage to Rachael (Genesis 29).

The normal Jewish courtship was a year in which the bride-groom prepared a place for the bride.

The spiritual truth is, that is what Jesus did for all believers. He paid a price for our

Lives. He became the sin dowry to the Father. He returned to the Father to prepare a

place for us.

The first three chapters of the Song of Solomon are the courtship. The marriage takes

place in the fourth chapter. I want to touch on the first three chapters

This lesson is just an overview. I want point out the process of finding a mate that

the Lord lays out for us in this text.

LUST OF THE FLESH

When Jacob saw Rachel for the first time, he ahab her, the Hebrew word for sexual affection.

He didn’t know Rachel, had never met her, but on first sight he ahab her.

(Genesis 29:18). The English translation of the Hebrew word is our word love. Therefore

it lost it’s true meaning.

Similarly when Solomon saw dark skinned woman, He ahab her. It was sexual affection

not love.

Let me suggest that the lust of the flesh finds it’s way into most intimate relationships.

What the eyes see, what the ears hear, what the mind thinks, and what the nose smells

are all involved. It in the Song.

COMMITMENT TO THE PROCESS

King Solomon was committed to the marriage. There is no mention of a dowry

According to Jewish custom, a commitment to an amount for a dowry was

in the marriage contract and paid to the father of the bride. Certainly, Solomon

was able to pay the dowry.

Jacob worked for a month for his uncle then committed to work 7 years

for Rachel (Genesis 29:18)

Love requires sacrifice. Jesus showed His love for us by sacrificing Himself.

Love overlooks faults. None of us are perfect.

While we were yet sinners Christ died for us

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

Jacob first saw Rachel at the well with her father's sheep. Jacob rolled away the stone

from the well for Rachel to water the sheep (Genesis 29:10).

Solomon saw the beauty of the Shulammite woman while she worked in the vineyard.

There is a story floating in some circles that Solomon dressed Himself as a shepherd

went out to the vineyard, observed her beauty, then proposed to her. As the story

goes, he went back to Jerusalem and dressed himself as King. He went back to the

farm and brought her to Jerusalem for the wedding feast (Tom Tucker, Senior Pastor

Sisk Memorial Baptist Church, August 2013). Where this story came from, I do not know.

What we do know according to the text is Solomon married a dark complexion woman.

First impressions are important. You may never get another chance to make another impression. The Shulammite woman impressed Solomon with her looks and her work ethic.

THE COURTSHIP

Song of Solomon starts with the courtship. In today's environment, many couples

skip the courtship and live together before marriage. To each his/her own, but that

is not the way God designed marriage.

When Adam first saw Eve, he said, she is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. He

made a commitment to her.

God set the contract for the first marriage;

Genesis 2:24-25

24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

Chapter one begins with the longing of the bride for her future husband. Notice she is specific

about what she wants.

Song of Solomon 1:2-4

2 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth —

for your love is more delightful than wine.

3 Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes;

your name is like perfume poured out.

No wonder the maidens love you!

4 Take me away with you — let us hurry!

Let the king bring me into his chambers.

We rejoice and delight in you;

we will praise your love more than wine.

The word love used here is the Hebrew word ahab, which means sexual affection.

The woman had a sexual affection for Solomon.

Let’s not fool ourselves.

God made Sex

Sin corrupted sex

Sex is completed in Christ

Sex should be controlled by the Holy Spirit

Some commentaries completely spiritualize this text deleting any thought of a

relationship between a couple. However, God decided to write this as an actual

event.

God wrote the manual for sex in marriage;

1 Corinthians 7:3-5

The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time.

God described our worship of anything other than Him as adultery.

When we think about the love of Jesus. It should excite us, refresh us and be

a source of great joy. Jesus is the bridegroom and we are His bride.

The perfume in the Song may represent the character of the groom. When the wise men came to Jesus

they brought myrrh which may represents His righteousness.

KNOW YOUR WORTH

Going into any relationship you must know your worth. See yourself as you are but know

your value.

Song of Solomon 1:5

Dark am I, yet lovely,

O daughters of Jerusalem,

My mother's sons were angry with me

and made me take care of the vineyards;

Don’t let anyone define who you are. She said I am dark but lovely.

Know that God sees you as lovely. God does not define you by your race or color.

God sees you as His when you accepted Him as Lord.

She had value because of her obedience and her character.

Brothers, you must continuously compliment your girlfriends or spouses. Solomon

sets the example for us to follow.

Song of Solomon 1:15-16

15 How beautiful you are, my darling!

Oh, how beautiful!

Your eyes are doves.

Song of Solomon 2:2-3

2 Like a lily among thorns

is my darling among the maidens.

Everyone loves to hear words of praise, Be generous with yours.

Let the ones you love know how you feel about them. They don't

need to hear they are beautiful from others first. You are their spiritual and

physical support.

Doing the courtship some basic facts must be established

KNOWLEDGE OF RESPONSIBILITY

Financial Responsibility

After the commitment, the Bride Groom prepares a place for the bride

Jacob being in the land of the bride’s home took a job with

his uncle as a shepherd to pay off the dowery.

Ladies look for a man with a job. Look for a man with the objective to

provide for the family.

You cannot live on pretty words and good looks, but study income.

Solomon was king, so He had financial stability

KNOWLEDGE OF CHARACTER

What is the character of the couple?

We have already established that the bride was a working woman

The evidence of her hard work was the color of her skin, darken by the sun

tending the vineyard.

Solomon was the property owner. When He became King, he requested

wisdom to govern Israel from God.

KNOWLEDGE OF COMPATIBILITY

To know if you are compatible with someone you have to

spend some time with them. Verse 2:10-13

You need to know how they handle themselves around others.

You need to pay attention to how your future spouse treats you when

no one is around

ESTABLISH LOVE OF GOD

It is important to express our love often to our spouses.

The Shulammite woman constantly expresses her love for Solomon and Solomon

constantly expressed His love for her.

Be careful to note whether you future spouse has a relationship with Jesus

Does He or she serve God?

2 Corinthians 6:14-15

14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

Solomon was first a man of God.

CONSUMMATION OF MARRIAGE

The praise for the bride’s virginity

Song of Solomon 4:12-13

You are a garden locked up, my sister, my bride;

you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain.

Today sexual intimacy before marriage is the cool thing to do. It is not

God’s intent for marriage.

The consummation of the marriage

Song of Solomon 4:16-5:1

Let my lover come into his garden

and taste its choice fruits.

5 I have come into my garden, my sister, my bride;

I have gathered my myrrh with my spice.

I have eaten my honeycomb and my honey;

I have drunk my wine and my milk.

Is this sexual conversation? Men and women are sexual. It is a gift of God

to have a desire for family. Let it be controlled by the Word of God.

In Summary

Choose your spouse with wisdom

Make sure there is a commitment

Make sure there is financial stability

Make sure there is a commitment to serve God

Don’t be in a rush. Make the courtship long enough to

know the person's true character

Enjoy the courtship with encouraging words of love

Save sex for the marriage

If you you are married

DON’T STOP DATING

DON’T STOP THE COURTSHIP

DON’T STOP EXPRESSING YOUR LOVE

DON’T STOP ENJOYING YOUR SEXUAL ACTIVITIES